I’ve decided it is time to really go into this subject
I previously wrote
I really hate Melbourne. I used to love it, but now I hate it. After working two jobs in the city, I have realised that the people of Melbourne are oppurtunists. For example:
Trams and Trains: It doesnt matter if you get on a packed train at the first stop, and by halfway through the ride, it is emptied due to people changing to go to another line, and as you move to sit down, someone who just gone on, pushes you out of the way so they can sit down on the seat you were heading for.
Shopping: Many times Ive stood inline to buy whatever I wanted at the time, to have snotty girls dressed like they should be working at hooters to push in infront of me and to take longer to pay due to their phone coversation. Typically this consists of “ohhhhhh my godddddd” and other shit that I couldnt really give two hoots about.
There are many other examples, to me it makes me question Is Melbourne really the most liveable city?
I think not.
Look at our drivers for example, road rage galore. Our teenagers not only have no hope of ever owning their own home, or even going to university to study law or medicine due to Uni fees and interest rates, but they have no hope due to the way they are, they abuse people, they fight, they smoke and drink on trains, they show no respect to the elderly, who are the ones who went to war so these prissy little stuck up pricks could smoke and drink on trains. They live with a silver spoon in their mouth, a computer and playstation/xbox for every birthday and christmas and they expect the world to give them everything as we owe them something?
My new update and thought on this however is
I know that I have touched on this subject before, However I beleive that my previous rant about Melbourne was written hastely, and if I were to rewrite it like I am now, I could cover a lot more areas and dive more deeply into the basis of my dislike towards the city that I reside in.
I was born in Melbourne in the 80′s. Due to my fathers work, we were offered the chance to live in Perth when I was 6. There was also an offer to move to Canada. Both options would have changed my life dramatically. Our standard of living would have risen. However, we stayed put. The only place I have lived is Melbourne. I’ve lived through the times of the Melbourne Underworld, which was made famous from the “Underbelly” tv series which focused on the underword from the late 80′s to 2008.
I lived in the north suburbs for most of my life, I did live in the outer east for a while once I was an adult. I was born in Reservoir, and did not leave until I was 18. I then moved to Mill Park and while there split my time between there and Croydon. However, I am not sheltered by any means when it comes to surburbs in Melbourne.
I have experienced luxury living within the city, scummy drug affected areas like Richmond, and witnessed first account of what does happen in those big ugly brown units. I’ve also worked in various locations around Melbourne, in and out of the city. I’ve also experienced our so call shopping centres. Northlands, The Glen, Whitehorse.
The whole point of going deeper into this, is to try and establish as to why it sucks and how the current situation may have come about. Drugs, Crime, dirtiness and Alcohol problems.
Melbourne was established in 1835. 47 years after the first European settlement of australia. Our history, is that we derive from convicts. That is only the beginning however, After those first ships sailed into botany bay, and many aboriginals were murdered and driven off cliff’s, we gained population from migration. Italy, Greece, England, America, Asia, the middle east.
We are a “Multicultural” city. We depend on tourism, and overseas workers, Although this brings its own problems. Melbourne is not united. It does not matter how many “harmony” walks you have through the city, there will still be a great big wall dividing us.
We have Chinatown in little Bourke street, Little Greece, somewhere in the city, which is being taken over slowly by Chinatown, and then we have little Italy.
The problem in melbourne is that a lot of indian students are being bashed. It is not a case of white vs indian. The pricks who are bashing people, are also indian, they are asian, they are european, However, sometimes the population of migrants who have no manners shit me that much that I tell if they were not so rude and pushy they wouldnt get bashed all the time. I know, its politically wrong of me. But when I am in a shop waiting to pay for something and there is a long line behind me and a rude prick pushes in to pay $3.21 on a fucking credit card, then I get real shitty.
There is no assimilation with migrants, they are not above the rest of the population, just like the rest of the population is not above them. I will not have a muslim for example, speak to me like I am a piece of shit, and when this has happened, the arsehole has copped a barrage of abuse from me.
But the problem of melbourne, isnt just the rude pricks who visit here or live here. Our courts are being paid for god knows what. You can murder someone and get 5 years for it. But if you break a “civil law” then you are more fucked up. You can bash someone, and get a good behaviour bond, If you are a footballer, or sportsman, you can rape someone or assault them, and get off on the charge. And this is partly why, there is a life of crime, our “rolemodels” break the law and get away with it, so people think they can do the same and get away with it, and most of them do.
Melbourne needs tougher punishment, we need judges who will punish criminals instead of letting them walk free. And if international students or tourists break the law, deport them asap and ban them from re-entering Australia forever.
As with everywhere, we have Italians, Greeks, Spaniards, Croates, Serbs and so on walking around like they are top shit, the little pissy gangs who think they own “turf” hey, you think you own lalor station? Great, if so, clean it the fuck up, it needs a new coat of paint and the tiles need to be mopped. Same with those who think they own certain shopping centers. If I “owned” Northlands, or Chadstone, I wouldnt be sitting around getting high on spray paint or drinking in the gutter with my fully sik mates. I would be off spending all the money I would have from the profits. Oh wait, you dont have profits, boo hoo you dont really own it. Get the drift?
Melbourne itself has tourist attractions. Apparently. Melbourne aquarium, the MCG, Flinders station, Crown Casino, Bourke St Mall, Docklands, Melbourne Zoo. And so on.
Have you ever been to the Aquarium? I went a few times, my nephew and I managed to walk through it in 28 minutes. He was bored. Its not exciting, a lot of it is empty space with nothing to see. Wow there are a few different types of jelly fish in little tanks and then some ocean fish and snakes in a big round tank. Then you have more fish, and sharks downstairs, yes, because a tank of the same species of sharks as well as 500 of the same god damn fish swimming around in circles is so entertaining to see. And now there are penguins, the price rises because they have built another room, but you know what? The penguins are not that exciting.
The MCG?? Yes its so much fun to go there, but only if you like cricket or football. If you dont like those sports, dont bother going there. Flinders station you ask?? There is a new game, spot the one sitting on the steps wearing color. Unless you are gothic or emo, this isnt really an attraction that is worth seeing. Oh, yeah and I hope you dont mind looking at all the clocks with broken windows underneath them. You know how they got like that? Indians protesting against the violence, decided to vandalise them. Because breaking a law while protesting against someone else breaking laws is like so cool! And will surely make you get noticed.
Crown Casino? Yes, go waste your money. Its such a great entertainment venue, so great infact that the majority of people who go there are tourists.
Bourke Street mall has cleaned up, I admit that, Its a lot brighter at night time, and it is so much cleaner then it used to be, but in the same sense if you dont like Myers or David Jones there isnt anything else for you to do there.
The docklands are great, they are new, and rather refreshing, but there isnt too much there, apart from a failed wheel. The shopping is okay for now, even though you go once, you go twice, but its different shops as the previous ones have closed down. And as for melbourne zoo, everytime I have been there, masses of animals are never on show.
Melbourne has an issue with graffiti. It is everywhere, murals are not so bad, but “tags” are just disgusting and are all over the place. How can we be the most livable city when we look like a pile of dog turd that has been smothered all over the footpath?
Things need to be done in order to clean this place up. More police on the street? Tighter liquor licensing laws? Who knows. Maybe education needs to be in place in high schools and universities as well as tafes, about the effects of illegal and legal drugs as well as what may happen when people are under the influence. Maybe curfews needs to be in place for certain areas of the city, which I know would move the trouble elsewhere, and business would be lost. But something needs to be done, to punish those who repeatively go out and drink and then cause problems.
I saw a male being apprehended by the police on the corner of flinders and swanston street one night, about 8pm. He was very drunk and abusive, spat in the face of police and then told them “You cant touch me, im a visitor” Which makes me think, the problem isnt just in our backyard, it is also an international problem which unfortunately is pounding the wax out of our ears. But the question is, why are so many people suddenly acting out like this once they have a few drinks? Why here and not anywhere else? Is it because we allow it by not having a stronger justice system? Do we need to pull back on everything recreational and put more police out on the street to fight against this crap? Which would then lead to less police in other areas so crime or law breaking would rise in other areas.
New York had this problem once, Now its safer then it has ever been. They put police out on the streets. Maybe it will work here, but another problem I think we have is that our pathetic city council is rather happy to spend $240,000 on a silly logo that someone who just learnt how to make graphics in the ‘omgz its the internet” era of 1996-1999. Why not allow the people of Melbourne to design a logo or image that they think defines Melbourne? Why give it to an american company whose Australian headquarters are in Sydney?
The point is though is that the council spends so much money on crap, that they could be funneling that money to fixing the CBD. Would it hurt them to fix up the look of the streets? Cracked footpaths, or ones which have been lifted up because of roots growing from the trees? I know we have streetsweepers, for the road and the footpath, and they have no problem in running people over. But Melbourne deserves better then this. Sure we are a sporting mecca, but with the mix of sporting and alcohol, Melbourne isnt much else. Oh there is food too, Great isnt it, go watch some sport, have a drink or 50 and then eat a kabab. Melbourne needs a definition. Something that we can all work towards and achieve. Something that is realisitc.
Melbourne – the drunk town
Melbourne – violence is just around the corner.
Great sayings for now isnt it? Because really, it is our current definition. Why cant we work towards something more happy?Melbourne – Where all our worlds come together.
Multiculturalism at its finest, bringing together the worlds of many types of people in any shape or form. That does not currently describe Melbourne. Funny hey?
So in conclusion, Melbourne was a great place to live maybe 5 years ago, but now, it’s just another city on a map that has major problems. Its a blur amongst the terrain, it only stands out now because of its problems.
What a great blog this is, I found it after typing in “get me out of Melbourne” in Google. I am 33, I am from south Melbourne, went to a private school in Melbourne, grew up here, worked here etc etc and so on.
I have had a gut full of Melbourne and I am leaving, I just can’t stand the pretentiousness, the crowding, the stressed infrastructure and the disingenuous characteristics anymore.
I also can’t tolerate the booming population (that the moronic politicians we have to endure allow) that is crippling Melbourne’s job market, roads, streets, property market, public transport, etc etc etc the list goes on and on and on
I agree entirely with the delusional attitude problem that the people of Melbourne have, that has been listed here so often, and that the generation below me are the most unpleasant, selfish, rude, manner-less, scruffy, spoilt, ungrateful and generally intolerable set of humans I’ve ever come across.
though from here, I have lived overseas and also travelled to more than 30 countries and spent a number of years away, not to say I know it all and have seen it all, but I have seen a bit and had a go, and I haven’t sat around Melbourne drinking latte’s and savvy-b, reading the age and dicking around with my mates at the mcc all my life.
It’s not what it was. The best of Melbourne is behind us I’m afraid, so is Australia for that matter, weve seen the best of our country, but thats an even wider issue. I’m taking my $ and fu*king off down the west coast for a slower and more fair dinkum life. Life is just too short for this rat-race too-much-attitude bullsh*t. cheers.
Melbourne’s not perfect, but I really don’t see why people get so bent out of shape. I visited Melbourne two times before moving out here permanently. Yea, people are a bit impersonal but I kind of like that fact that people aren’t walking around with giant, idiotic grins on their faces. People are nice once you actually sit down and chat with them, but you have to put yourself out there a bit. Any place that I frequent usually remembers me and I have struck up more conversations with strangers in my year of living here than in my whole 20+ years living in Los Angeles.
Then people go on about how ugly the city is? As far as an Urban Center goes, it’s absolutely immaculate. There’s the odd litter here and there, but not nearly as dirty as people make out. Go to Portland, New York or Paris and then talk to me about Sanitation issues.
Transport sucks? Try LA. I don’t have a car, and you know why? Because I don’t need one. I can hop a train or tram (and less often a bus) and get where I need to. Cost of living is cheaper here for the sole fact that I haven’t needed to pay for Petrol, Rego, Insurance or upkeep on a car. Compare that with LA or Chicago where a car is a necessity and you drive between 60 and 80 miles per day.
Melbourne is dangerous yet some how pretentious and hoity-toity? Please explain that logic. The worst occurrence I could say I have witnessed was hearing about a stabbing outside of my work in Broadie. Again, try LA if you want dangerous. I’m also completely unaware of the douchebags that everyone is so concerned with… it’s a simple fix really; don’t hang around them. If you’re running into too many stuck-up people then you’re probably going to stuck-up places (and by extension stuck-up yourself). There are plenty of little places to see quality performances; just because an act isn’t world-famous doesn’t mean it’s bad. I’ve found these sorts of venues to be full of perfectly reasonable, friendly people. I suppose some people go to a city and have a way of finding all the wrong people and places. The worst I’ve experienced is someone saying “Go back to your country” (I have an American accent), which I found ironic seeing as I was born here and all my family lives here and I’m actually happy to be here. He was also a drunk-ass looking for a fight.
As for the drivers… I totally agree. Melburnians are god-awful drivers and I’m surprised the road toll isn’t higher. Having spent a fair amount of time walking around Tijuana Mexico, I’ve come to peace with near misses.
They say Australians are racist, and I don’t deny there’s a strong racial undertone, but the irony of Melbourne is that the nastiest, most racist people are actually immigrants, or children of immigrants who fancy themself as somehow white. They think they’re above other immigrants and look down on those who respect their origins.
The reason people are arrogant and rude is because there all incredibly time poor and melbourians tend to have a low tolerance towards bogans and uneducated types.
it also sounds like ive never really lived in a big city, and lack necessary street smarts to make your time in melbourne enjoyable.
melbourne is the only australian city that doesn’t feel it needs to cater to tourists. Thats why its tough. you either adapt or vacate!
dont be haters!
I was born and raised in Melbourne, and will freely admit that it is not as cheap, friendly or safe as it used to be, but it still goes okay. Melbourne is not overtly friendly (it’s a city, not a theme park) but people are happy enough to talk to you if you make the effort. Personally, I love to meet out of towners and try to make them feel welcome. I will cop the fact that the weather is eccentric, but spend a winter in London or Toronto and then come back and complain. But yes, the public transport system is a joke and the girls here are definitely too deeply embedded in their own arses to notice you. It seems to me that this comments sections has been dominated by a bunch of people who find themselves alone and unhappy in Melbourne, whether they be locals or new arrivals, for purely persoanl reasons. I’m sorry things aren’t going well, but I dare say you would encounter the same problems in any other city of the same size. As a teacher of international students I encounters these gripes daily, but for every one person who pisses and moans about Melbourne, there are about five who love it. Stop scowling and start smiling; Melburnians, like most human beings, might just smile back.
melbourne has become a arrigant place bad drivers rude no time for no one !! they think rest australia revolves around them
oh best city in the world ”dont think so !! cant get coffee after a time except mackers or food even at lygon street during the week sydney yes ;;they not so snobby more helpful too
its dying city in many ways no water no infracstruture its all poor i dont care im leaving for ever ;; its better any were else
even at sarah dessert good ridiance melbourne you all crazy
melbourne people are super arogant! the mederteranian people by in large are quite disgustingly rude aswell as the arabs here (Generalising ofcourse,but calling it like i see it) and they dont do themselves any favours by there public behaviour
public transport is quite behind for the population and is a very very expensive city to buy a home ,if you want anything slightly affordable and realistic to a 1st home buyer you have to move to outside melbourne (regionable)
Traffic is F****ed! as soon as you get outside of your door there is a traffic jam untill around 7.30-8pm this is probably caused by the bad public transport that needs some serious cash injection and the food is expensive ..oh yes they do say melbourne is cheap eating ..yeah for maybe fried rice and kebabs and chips but other than that your paying $20+ for anything 1/2 decent and close to $10 for a pint …Expensive much ,HELL YES!
Dont like it much here but i have reasonable paying job and my fiancee has a very well payed job considering how much she was getting payed before and we are in the process of building a house so …we are here to stay ,so ill just have to suck it up but i heard sydney is much worse
I moved to Melbourne from the U.S. 7 years ago. It is the worst, ugliest, city I have ever laid eyes on. I have 2 years left here and will be leaving, thank god! It is not about the people!. It is the culture. How can AFL be that exciting! Shopping and fashion is great for the princesses or the girls that like to be dressed like whores. Don’t people get sick of drinking and gambling? There is nowhere pretty to go do anything for free! (sorry, the Dandenongs are not that nice) I feel sorry for anyone who has been stuck in this ugly, expensive city. The only people who would like it here would have to be people with lots of $$$$$$ or people who know no different. People who don’t have a good job or family $$$ would be struggling just to live at the poverty line. Most liveable city???? What a joke! Can’t wait to leave.
I wasnt going to reply but thought I would. I moved to Melbourne 3.5 years ago from Ireland. There are problems, driving is shocking there is no respect on the roads at all drivers cant use merging lanes, for example in Ireland/UK if someone is trying to merge and you move into the next lane they thank you for it, here they think you are doing it to stay ahead of them and cut you up. I feel like making them stop and saying I was just letting you merge you F***ing ass***e, but that would probably end up with me draging them out of the car…. so now I just follow suit with everone else and be ignorant. But I have had people cut me up driving into KFC car park and then hold the door open for me on the way in! Fine to be ignorant when they are behind the wheel safely in their 5.0lt v8 car where no one can say anything to them.
Apart from the driving the other problems of drink, drugs, teenagers thinking that everything should be laid on a plate for them or the results from a survey of university students thinking that they will earn $90k starting salary with a basic degree in business studies or IT, dream on…. these are all over the world. There are some great events in Melbourne that are taken for granted, sport (F1, V8′s, superbikes, tennis,etc) that are all world class. Every big artist in the world plays here and its all easy to get to.
The thing that Melbourne lacks is Soul or some drive. Everyone forms their own little groups of friends normally based on their home country and thats about it. Apart from a few bars in the city you go into a bar in the suburbs and all you see is some mid life crisis victim wearing teenagers clothes trying to chat up the randomly tattooed peroxide blonde barmaid. Not that life should revolve around the bar but its an indicator of life. I live in the suburbs but choose to live in a new area with a private residents club etc and have a good group of friends that we enjoy all the things there are on offer with each other. Yes we have formed a insular group but its the way of life here.
Its not that big of a deal to me the way life is here, the negatives are outweighed by the positives and we can afford things here that we couldnt dream of in Ireland so we would never leave. I would recommend Melbourne to anyone but you have to be prepared for the reality and willing to put in the effort to find your way here, no one will help you do that.
guys, i forgot to mention, melbourne is one of the MOST expensive cities in the world..can anyone tell me why ?
there is absolutely nothing here.
oh , except for the yarra river.. joke
hi
i agree melbourne is only good for people escaping communism eg china or wars eg: sudan & somalia. any place with normal human rights they are going to think is paradise. but compared to rest of australia, melbourne is a blight on the landscape.. endless suburban boredom.
i vote for smaller towns, less road rage, less hopeless trains, etc
I agree with Jerry the drivers a shocking
i nearly got cleaned up on a Friday arvo in north Melbourne i kick the side of the van to let him no he not only fail to give way but he Nealy killed my new puppy and me i chased him up at the next set of lights and he jumps out and just starts punching on so i was under attack and defended my self yet i did for months in Remand
for chasing him up all i wanted was a I d on the prick pity if i had no peripheral or it had of been a mum and pram Melbourne is seriously fucked don’t kid yourself boys and girls
old school is out the window
Re safety in numbers
as from his post your rite on m8 !!!
Jerry 19 December 2010 at 12:11 pm #
I too have lived in many cities in Australia and in other countries and recently (5 Months ago) moved to Melbourne…I feel the biggest problem with Melbourne (besides the shit house weather) is that Melbournians are self obsessed, very unwelcoming and unless your are born and bread here, quite frankly they don’t want to know you!
I am still yet to meet anyone who was interested in even being social-able towards me.
I would also like to add that Melbourne drivers are the WORST i have ever seen…I think at last count I have had about 6 very close calls on pedestrian crossing because drivers are too self obsessed with their own importance to stop!!
GET ME OUT OF HERE ASAP!!!!!
Hi,
Just came back to Melbourne after one year travelling overseas when I had my eyes opened about all the flaws of “our” city.
Melbourne is very unkempt. The shop signs, road planning and general outlook is messy.
The people are rude and completely inflexible.
Cafe and restaurant owners are pretentious.
You can’t have free fun here; you have to consume, consume, consume.
There is not enough emphasis on environmental sustainability and we’re falling right behind other major cities around the world.
I always wonder about how any visitor could possible enjoy themselves here. The so called “hidden treasures” are limited to handful of cafes and bars. There’s really not that much to do here!
I’m happy to see that I’m not the only one
funny qld people are uneducated! (however they have that excuse) , melbourne … wank on , at least some are willing to learn. Wake up the worlds just a little larger then your home.
I live here since half a year. (I came because my partner lives here and I hope we go somewhere else one day) I am from Austria. Melbourne is expensive in everything, the weather is terrible. Melbourne sells itself like a hure / it has not a long history but they try to sell every little thing as a historic thing and you have to pay for it (There are not many places where you don’t have to pay for entry. And all this new estates are soooo shit) this traffic to get in or out f$&^*(@%. The police is unfriendly and they get too much power of the goverment. It seems the only thing what people have in there mind is to go shopping shopping shopping and being beauty. They don’t realise what really counts in life. And then you find everywhere the same shops what have mostly cheap rubbish from China. I am not really happy here.
It is true that it seems like every other week there is an article in the media re: the hoary old Sydney versus Melbourne ‘issue’ and if you take a glance at the various online readers’s posts connected to one of those stories (before your eyes start to glaze over) there will be endless posts demonising Sydneysiders & the city they live in. Of course, you’ll also get Sydney people bagging Melbourne online (& I’m not condoning that btw), but not with the same vitriol or in the same numbers as the pro-Melbourne posters. It seems impossible for some Melburnians to extol the virtues of their city without dumping on Sydney (or to a lesser extent Brisbane), ‘second city syndrome’ it appears difficult to get over for some.
The other day I was looking at a Facebook page for a particular musician and the page had a photo of the artist posing at the Sydney Opera House (where they were to perform) and a comment was added to the photo by a Melbourne based fan that stated “Melbourne is better than Sydney”, nothing to praise the artist, just another parochial, cheap shot at Sydney…that is what gets to me about the mentality of some living there.
Arts capital?, I suppose if they keep saying it people will be lazy enough to believe it, but I have seen some brilliant stuff happening in other state capitals too that could rival Melbourne’s efforts quite easily. Melbourne has had the good forune of people willing to invest in events & these events are keeping the city in the spotlight but public transport is so-so and it seems perverse to keep building sports facilities when public housing is in desperate need of money to be spent on it.
There is some fine Victorian era architecture (that survived the 60s/70s/early 80s, though a lot was lost, a point Melburnians don’t seem to crow about) but that is where the limit of preservation largely stops, it seems in the current rush to whack up investment property apartments heritage is taking a bit of a back seat these days (witness Lonsdale House’s demolition). Melbourne for all the talk of a city/CBD boom is still one of the worst offenders in Australia for urban sprawl.
And if I have to hear/read another unsubstantiated thing about how supposedly great Melbourne’s coffee is compared to everyone else’s, I’ll puke!
Yeh M8 whait till the A.T.O get hold of your small business they will kill it like they did mine all small Business must go…….
Pity all our ways of a good life hear a rocked bye corruption >>IBAC<<< pushed off for another 12 months so now they can cover it all up
no one is accountable on purpose
Go Andrew MAcintosh
nice one on this
lifestyles Cactus cause the all Flucking Corrupt Pricks that cant get a life so they have to fuck ours to
i am on permanent holidays due to septicemic corruption
no jobs to many pricks from over seas hear
cheers M8
I moved down from country Victoria to study in 2008, and although I think melbourne is really just a place with nothing special about, the one thing I absolutely HATE HATE HATE are the homeless, half of whom aren’t homeless but share with friends iPhones, buying tv’s at the Salvos, and caught them tripping-balls 1 hour after giving them money for food) who think that they deserve your money. Just today at the state library I had a man ask me for money for a metcard, I offered him mine which was valid all day (full fare) and he got 1cm from my face and started swearing and threatening me. When I first moved down I felt really bad for homeless people and always tried to help out, but always they hassle and threaten you for more. I think just about everyone in Melbourne has a bug up their a***.
Melbourne sucks because everything is so car dependent and everything is so far away from each other, the suburbs are really confusing to get around to, every major shopping zone or place of interest is isolated between large unnecessary suburbs, This city certainly isn’t as interesting as Tokyo or the United States in terms of a technologically advanced economy, Melbourne sucks!
Melbourne’s great except for the people & weather. FakeMelbourne’s right – You can live in a city like Melbourne and be surrounded by people and still be lonely. It’s a contrast to Brisbane when I was there for a short secondment. First day I arrived, I bought a slice of pizza from a restaurant and the boss there was so nice and easy to have a chat with. Not like in Melbourne – you won’t get a single word. It’s hard to pull a conversation. Unless you look rich or have something to enhance their status, ego and earning capacity. You can have many acquaitances in Melbourne but not real friends.
Secondly Melbourne is pretentious and consequently a tacky city. Tries to portray a veneer of classiness and sophistication like the other big cities in the world. But lacks a heart and doesn’t keep it real. There is no soul in Melbourne.
melbourne haa its laughing complex city ;;worlds best yer right !! theres cities in the world that leave melb for dead politness clieness cafes open all hours crime alot less per capital etc
roads trains parking all out dated people are self
ness rude to talk beeping at trafic the list goes on gals are rude abbussive for god sake smile
helps alot im glad im leaving to better place nor i would recomend visitor here go to perth /adeliade /sydney; brisbane even hobart way
not melbourne its out dated place in many ways
What the fuck is wrong with you people? Melbourne is not a cult, or a unified group, it’s a population and we’re all different, jesus. How can you judge a whole state of individuals so harshly?
I can turn all of these complaints around on other states and on other nations, nothing that’s been said is limited to just Melbourne, and in many places, things are a hell of a lot worse.
Look on the bright side- Maybe if your vision wasn’t clouded by such negative light, you’d be able to spot something great about the city and actually have a good time, because once you stop whining, it’s so much easier to do.
I HATE MELBOURNE!! The people are SO STUCK UP. The women are rude bitches & the men are arrogent wankers Im from Adelaide all they do is bag shit out of our city. At least its clean here & the traffic is manageable!
All I see Melbourne as is a dirty stinky lonley filty melting pot.
Sydney is WAY better, I have been there plenty of times for work & have never experienced any sort of rudeness like the way i have been treated in melbourne.
I have also travelled O/S to London, USA, & parts of Canada & i mean WTF??? Who do these MELBOURNITES think they are!!!
They have an attitude like they are BETTER than any of city in Australia – Whatever – the rest of Australia is laughing at them
They can go fuck themselves – cause i will be telling everyone what cunts they are!!
They are just BOGANS in diguise who love the AFL which i hate Oh & the weather is total SHIT!!
hahaha
I often ask people what do you do? Because i d like to know his interests etc. But often people think that i am asking how much you earn. I don’t have problems with money. It seems that you are just a bit unsecure and blame/judge all people the same in a bad way. I live in Brisbane and it is difficult sometimes here with achivements and not many opportunites and sometimes it makes me really upset that so many people are strugling for one good place. But it is not problem of bad Australians. We have too many people on the earth and our world population is still increasing. We have “Green house” effect problem and have to rebuilt a lot that means taking money away from people. This influence jobs and prices and makes difficult to have normal life.
It’s funny reading these comments, I’m laughing and nodding my head as I understand exactly what people are talking about.
I was born and lived in Melbourne until I was 27 years old then moved to Sydney but at the time I thought it was just my friends and workmates that were pretentious and superficial. I must say though that I was like this myself until something clicked inside me and I wanted more out of life as I was realizing my life was shallow.
Sydney people were friendly and down to earth and I am so glad I left Melbourne as it opened my eyes as to how much of a #$@%head I was and a lot of people from Melbourne are.
I have visited Melbourne and worked for a few days at my brothers office and it was so funny to hear the same old pretentious BS,the two faced backstabbing and the petty little dramas that went on. Everyone was using the trendy wanna be entrepreneur slang like “niche markets”, “win/win solutions”, “moving forward with positive solutions” etc etc that they parrot from their motivational tapes or books on 10 steps to being a multi-millionaire. They talk all day about how busy they are and do NOTHING (and I mean nothing) except boost their ego on imaginary actions that they won’t do in the future. They were a lot like David Brent from the UK show “The Office”
Anyway, that was a long time ago and I live in Italy now and really miss Sydney but Melbourne would be one of the last places I would return. Thanks to all the posters to, it brought back a lot of funny memories
ciao
I moved down to Melbourne about a year ago for a few reasons:
1. to live with my family who moved down not long before me for the reason of the best pediatric Medical facilities in Australia
2. so i could do my cert 3 in hairdressing for much cheaper than i could in Brisbsane.
But these are the only 2 plus sides i have found to this crap hole of a city. Coming from Brisbane to Melbourne was like going from a place where there are plenty of artistic, friendly, intelligent people with open minds; to a place that seems to be full of pretentious bogans who turn everything into an elaborate pissing contest. i’ve seen the side of Melbourne where everybody is only interested in networking, i’ve lived in a neighborhood where syringes were found on the footpath or in the gutter, and during the entire time that i’ve lived in this city only one person has decided to talk to me with supposedly no alterior motive, though i found out later that the guy was only interested in trying to get into my pants. Melbourne is slightly better when it’s not football season, but its still the most divided city i’ve ever lived in, or heard about. Apart from being with my family, i made a HUGE mistake moving to Melbourne, and now i’m having a hell of a bad time trying to get myself back out. the whole city is like a vacuum sucking you in and not letting you go.
I also don’t understand the whole crap about every Melbournian seeming to think it’s a great idea to try and sell this “great” city to everyone they meet. my theory is, they’re trying to sell the damn place so its finally not in their posession, but since even those who aren’t buying it can have huge troubles trying to get back out of this city, i can’t see how they’re ever going to manage to lose this city.
I moved from Brisbane to Melbourne to start a dream job almost 12 months ago. The city is completely disgusting. Everybody walks around with either a scowl or a frown and are incredibly rude to anyone who is not in their clique.
After 4 months of working the dream job while living in this hell-hole, I quit and went back to Brisbane.
I haven’t been able to find solid work since and am living below the poverty line, but I’m 100x happier. Melbourne just sucks the life out of you and tries to kill any joy you could create.
David
I’m 34, my wife is 29 and we have a 2 year old daughter. We moved from Joburg to London and things were awesome over there until the GFC hit. Then it got really hard. So, we came to Melbourne where some of our family have immigrated to (from South Africa) and thought we would start again and build a good life.
I now feel that we have made a mistake. I can’t stand this place. The weather is no good, I’ve found people to be friendly but always keeping everyone at arms-length. It’s been so difficult to find decent friends and connect with people on the most basic level. My wife does not have a single friend here. I have some acquaintances but no real mates. It just seems too hard to crack this place. London was a breeze; 6 months in and we were fully settled and loving it.
Then there is the fact that there is bugger-all to do here. It’s so bloody isolated and boring. Shopping? There is only so much shopping one can do, and honestly, London shits all over this place for shopping anyway. Beaches? They suck!
I’ve been living in Melbourne for almost 3 years now and I really don’t know whats up with all this flaming. I come from Singapore and I have not experienced any more racism than in other countries. Sure you get the occasional asshole but honestly I’ve had worse in Asian countries, bear in mind that I am Asian. I believe if you actually go out and talk to people they will respond to you, I’ve done it. I’ve had the occasional ass for a bouncer but there are many clubs in Melbourne.
I’m not saying the city is perfect but I don’t think it is as bad as you are making it out to be. If you want a bunch of stuck up and pretentious pricks who won’t talk to you and push in front of you in a que, go to Singapore.
ok i have to admit it, melbourne is an expensive place and if you dont have money ur gonna be living in some shithole suburb trying to pay your mortgage , soaring food costs. and reason with the dickhhead bankers cos there intrest is so high and so on. yer if u dont have much money then unfortunatly your not gonna do to well in melbourne.
Luckily, im in a family that does have money, living in the inner east, mum doesnt work and we can enjoy the nice parts of melbourne and because we can afford those expensive dinners or shopping trips, melbourne is a wonderful, clean and safe place. for us that is.
if your one of the unlucky ones not so fortunate then yer u could really have to cop it to get by.
on the melbournians are rude and arrogant…… ur not serious right. just cos people dont speak and act like bogans doesnt mean their rude and arogant. i find everyone very friendly. unlike some certain europeans whom i shall not mention :/
melbournes an awesome place. just stay on the good side of town and ull love it
Personally I am disgraced that this is the impression that people get when they come to Melbourne. I have lived in Melbourne for my whole life, first in Kensington and then in Essendon and I think that it isn’t a bad place to live. I have been to Perth and Sydney and think that they rank on much the same level as Melbourne.
Yes our weather is extremely fucked up.
Sometimes the trains, trams and buses are late or cancelled but recently they have been pretty well operated.
I have not met any of these extremely obnoxious people that apparently inhabit Melbourne and I do not consider myself to be one.
I do concede though, that we have some pretty pussy “gangs” which is just disgraceful to everyone who lives here.
Overall, if you are street smart and know which areas to avoid then Melbourne is not a bad place to live. Though I cannot see why anyone would decide to live here on a holiday.
I left Melboure 3 years ago to move to Switzerland. – For many of the reasons mentioned above. If you don`t like the place,then don`t live there.
I don’t like Melbourne anymore! People are so rude and they are not real. Where I come from people look out for one another!! I haved lived here for 10 years!!! People judge you by what sort of job you have, if you own your own home!! This is F….. Bullshit. The gap between the rich and the poor is so wide, it is beyond repair!! Well now you can’t take your money to the grave with you; some people try low. Where I am currently living for the last three years I don’t even know my next door neighbour. You can live in a city like Melbourne and be surrounded by people and still be lonely.
Melbourne sucks. It’s like torture living here and I hope to move out of what it calls itself a “city”. But i’d also like to add on to the problems with crime, public transport issues etc,the fact that THE WEATHER IS HORRIBLE. On 1 day it could be 31 degreees and then the next day 17 degrees. It’s summer right now and last week it dropped to 20 degrees, and a few days after that it became 40 degrees. I really really really hate melbourne.
I too have lived in many cities in Australia and in other countries and recently (5 Months ago) moved to Melbourne…I feel the biggest problem with Melbourne (besides the shit house weather) is that Melbournians are self obsessed, very unwelcoming and unless your are born and bread here, quite frankly they don’t want to know you!
I am still yet to meet anyone who was interested in even being social-able towards me.
I would also like to add that Melbourne drivers are the WORST i have ever seen…I think at last count I have had about 6 very close calls on pedestrian crossing because drivers are too self obsessed with their own importance to stop!!
GET ME OUT OF HERE ASAP!!!!!
Very candid and truthful article. You took the thoughts right out of my head and wrote them down. I am tired of people in supposedly ‘cultured’ ‘refined’ Melbourne acting like this is some big New York City. People here need to come down from their high-horse, quit that arrogance and take a chapter from the outside overseas world. I’ve been to London, Paris and NYC, and can say I’ve met warmer, friendlier, kinder people who don’t act above themselves and go out of their way to help you. The rudest person I met in NY was a Russian immigrant, in Paris- black immigrants, and London, well, no one. They were all cohesive and lovely. Here in Melbourne, no one likes anyone, and constantly points the finger and plays a blame game. Immigrants don’t even like certain other immigrants. There is no unity or culture here. Melbourne lacks community and identity. What do we celebrate here worth doing? Nothing. For all its arts reputation, what great productions/films ever comes out of Melbourne? Zippo. It’s all deceitful marketing. This city is known for nothing. I’ve been living here since I was 4, and I hate it now. It’s not the Melbourne of the early 90s. It’s succumbed to gross superficiality and material attitudes.
Those of you who have been posting to this and listed the cities that you have visited (then proceed to claim that those of us who have not been anywhere else other than Melbourne should shut up) need to realise that maybe your view of Melbourne is a positive one because you have money.
Melbourne is a GREAT city… if you have money.
If you were raised here, and have to live AND work here, Melbourne is fucking terrible.
Let me list the reaons why Melbourne sucks for normal people (ie. those without parental inheritance, have to work week after week to pay the bills, enter financial strife when they have kids, etc):
1. TRANSPORT:
MONEY: If you are moneyed and live in Melbourne, you can afford a house within an hour’s travel to work (if you even need to work). The inner suburbs have excellent tram networks, and the trains come more frequently due to the outer suburban lines intersecting further out on the line. You can afford a 4WD and driving around the city is more comfortable and less scary for you.
NORMAL: You either rent in a dingy shithole in Zone1 train network so that you can get to work within an hour, or you are paying off a mortgage in the outer suburbs and take two hours to get to work because there are no commercial precincts in the outer suburbs (unless you want to work minimum-wage in retail).
On the other hand, you’re probably self-employed working a trade and are forced to pay a crapload of tolls to get to your job sites in the ute. As you have to drive everywhere, you can’t merely pop over to the pub for a pint then come home, because the opportunistic police force knows you’ll be doing that and want to rake you for as much money as they can.
2. PRETTY THINGS:
MONEYED: You can visit all the pretty tourist stuff, and pay a hundred dollars for tickets to a family outing to the museum/football/aquarium without batting an eyelid. There are some gorgeous art-galleries and exhibitions/fares are held in Melbourne on a regular basis, which are definitely worth going to. Queen Vic market is a great place to buy souvenirs and organic produce.
NORMAL: You live in a suburban slum and the only tourist things to do out there that you can afford are: drive further out away from the city to visit the countryside, or you go to the massive shopping centres to let the kids look at all the overpriced stuff you get to spend an hour telling them you can’t buy for them.
3. SHOPS:
MONEYED: You can go to the boutique shops in the City and have no problems spending $400 on a new suit that’s in fashion.
NORMAL: You go to Chadstone and reminisce about how it used to be before all the rich asian students started going there (ie. you could buy a whole suit for under $100 outside of K-Mart), and you then proceed to drive out to Foutain Gate, only to end up going home frustrated because there’s nowhere to park.
4. FOOD:
MONEYED: The Lobster Cave, Stalactites, Rialto Towers, City Circle Tram, any Yum Cha restaurant, anything in St Kilda, all these are open to you (if you don’t mind calling a couple of days in advance to book), and all have excellent food and world-class service.
NORMAL: You take the family to Food Star or Lazy Moe’s once a year, and still bitch about it costing you $200 because your in-laws came along too. If you are single, your options extend to: chain-restaurant takeaway (KFC, Macdonalds, Red Rooster, Subway), or Kebabs served by fat old Turkish men that don’t believe in soap.
5. WORK:
MONEYED: Chances are that you have a job that corporations hold in high-demand, because your family paid for your education and supported you whilst you studied, so you can earn over the average national income level. This opens up the entire corporate world for you, and companies fight eachother for your employ.
NORMAL: Chances are that you have a trade that the government claims to hold in high-demand (and even imports foreign tradespeople to fill ‘the gaps’. read ‘reduce your workload’). Unless you work union jobs you have a very high chance of being screwed by the developer. You have less job-security than a prostitute in the Vatican City. Your entire career revolves around building houses in developing suburbs that you will never be able to afford, and once you realise this, you retire.
6. PUBLIC CONVERSATION:
MONEYED: You can go to great restaurants, drink some world-class coffee, sip on a martini in the casino, all surrounded by other people of the world who will ask you about ‘what you do’ so that they can judge you. Try to steer the conversation towards your favour, and you can walk away with an ego as big as your annual salary. Good times to be had by all!
NORMAL: Your coffee shops/tuck-shops are full of truckies who hate the city more than showering, your pubs are full of drunk dole-bludgers, and your shopping centres are being taken over by rich anti-social Indians and Chinese students who spend all their time talking on their cellphones in their native toungue so loudly that you can’t even hear your kid crying because they just stepped on him.
Oh, and good luck finding anybody in your economic demographic that shares a similar interest with you, now you get to spend all day on the internet talking about your interests with people in America!
7. THE AIRPORT:
MONEYED: You have no problems spending $50 to get from the Airport to your house in Coburg, the VHA chauffuer gets you there very quickly, and the car is kept in excellent condition.
NORMAL: You take the $15 (per person) bus to the CBD stations, and pay another $10 each for a train ticket to your house in Zone2 (that is, if you were lucky enough to get a train, because you took the red-eye flight as it was $50 cheaper).
8. THE POLICE:
MONEYED: The areas you frequent have so many security cameras that you feel safe even at 2 in the morning. There are patrol cars everywhere, shops are open till 11 at night, and there is a general nightlife of respectable people who won’t cause trouble.
NORMAL: You get to drive though shithole suburb after shithole suburb to get anywhere, and you carry a Club-Lock in your car that you can use to defend yourself in case some idiot decides to pick a fight. The police are nowhere to be seen, except when you stop paying attention to the speedometer on your car for ten seconds and instead focus on the dipshit Aussie drivers in their rust-buckets trying to beat eachother to the next red light, at which point YOU get the fine for being 5k over the limit, whilst the racing bogans get away scot-free.
You also have to drive everywhere to get to anything of interest/practicality, so you have a higher chance of being pinged for driving 3K over the limit because you were bored senseless of checking the speedo every five seconds on an empty 70kph road in the middle of nowhere (that you could have sworn was a 90kph road two kilometers ago).
My partner lives in Melbourne and I HATE THAT F***ING PLACE! Actually, I would like Melbourne if it wasn’t for all the disgusting, arrogant, pretentious pricks.
And I don’t know why they think they’re the fashion capital of Australia, everytime I go there all I see is Ed Hardy draped all over every second person.
melbourne is better than you think
I’ve lived in Melbourne for over half my life. The reason Melbourne sucks is because the people suck.
Melbournians are rude. On the streets. In the shops. On the roads. Thats why so many SUVs. Even the bicyclists act like animals. It really is something this city.
Melbournians are predatorial. For Melbournians MONEY IS EVERYTHING. If you look like you have some, they will try to rip you off. If you look like you have none, you are of no use to them.
Melbournians are up themselves. This is because most of them have nothing else they can claim to be. This is the same reason why many Melbournians harp on about being “sophisticated”. They have nothing else really except that. So they act pretentious.
Melbournians are status anxious. It is true that nowadays when you first meet someone here they will try to figure out “what you do” (ultimately this is to “figure out” how much you earn). This is so that they know whether or not they have to suck up to you, or whether they can look down on you. If they think they are better than you they will treat you like dirt. If not they will try to gain some advantage “networking” through you.
Someone before said that Melbournian workers are slackers. This one is also true. They are also incompetent and unprofessional, but expect to be paid well. The main skill in the workplace is how not to be “the last one in the race”, not that anyone gets fired anyway because there is such a shortage of workers. And new workers are just as bad as the ones they replace, or they quickly “learn to fit in to the work culture”, or they work till they drop whilst all the other slackers figure out how to put the blame on them because everyone else is being made to “look bad”. They do try to conceal it but this is the corporate culture here. Ignore all the hypocrisy you hear, Melbournians are VERY good at making noble speaches. For all you prospective students out there this is also true of the Deans of the main universities like Monash and Melbourne. Its all a show.
Melbournians are after only one thing: “The Big Kill”, “Easy Money”, “Big Bucks”.. anyway they can. This is a town where you are either a “Winner” or a “Loser”. Everyone wants to be a greedy Landlord to “rake it in”, or “make a buck” off of you. Decent people learn to hide. Be careful when you are here. Many have come and have been trapped. They are the ones who end up in the alleyways or worse. Don’t be fooled by the veneer of “sophistication”. It is just the bait. The town is a sham. It is a jungle. If you have money, for goodness sake keep quiet. If you don’t, for goodness sake keep quiet. Basically, for goodness sake just keep quiet.
Mel Burnian
I’m 24 and i used to frequent melbourne almost every weekend up until around the start of last year. The people are rude, the girls are unbelievably full of themselves, the males stalk the city trying to out do each other for f***wit of the week, the pubs/clubs are over priced.
And now we have the police walking the streets in there own gangs trying to stamp out gang and street violence?!?
Arrhh Melbourne…proberly the only place in the world where walking into a crowded fast food outlet at night could earn you a brutal beating.
F*** Melbourne
Oh god, I’m so relieved to find some people who don’t like it either. I moved from Wellington, NZ a few years ago and came back after 6 months. I found people to be more friendly, but it wass abrasive, very quick to want to know my position in life, job etc so they could see if they were better than me. I found the shopping great, but then with it available to everyone I kind of felt like whats the point? Bigger gap between rich and poor than NZ, and the rich are more showy about it. House prices anywhere near work etc just mad. Homeless and drug problems shocked me, turned down the wrong street in St Kilda once and saw all these people who just looked awful. Lots of people there come across very rascist, homophobic and nasty. The football thing is pretty weird to outsiders. My boyfriend loved Melbourne but I hated it. I found my co-workers very slack and unprofessional, and so were the managers. More hierarchical than Wellington, taking themselves seriously but not the work or the customers. I got paid more there and the cost of living was less, power bills are about a third of the cost in NZ because its not green energy. Service in restaurants and things was good so long as we tipped, NZ can be very hit and miss with service, we don’t have professional waiters as much, but then no one expects a tip. Summer was way too hot for me, and the flies grossed me out big time. The whole history with aborigines is unbelievable and I felt sick to the stomach that Australians just don deal with it, are still rascist towards them and aren’t trying to address the issues that face that community. I went to a museum in Melbourne that had real people’s stories about the stolen generation and I just cried and cried, because nothing that much has changed, you never see an aboriginal on tv or in the cbd in a suit, in parliament, never hear their languages. I’d like to go back for a holiday, but never to live again. I would: go in winter, photograph the laneway graffitti and beautiful big old buildings, go to the art galleries, boutiques, get Italian food, go to the wineries and Healesville, and go to the South Melbourne markets to hear the sales pitches, those guys are so funny. If you’re living in Melbourne and comtemplating coming for a trip to Wellington, come for: the lack of poisonous animals, beautiful creamy cheeses and good wines for cheap, green hills and victorian villas to photograph, art, friendly people who don’t care what you earn so long as you’re fun, a city thats walkable, safe, with a real heart and character to it, great cocktails and a friendly fun nightlife, especially matterhorn, mighty mighty, bodega, and san fran. And hey, you’ll still feel at home, we have cafes and restaurants everywhere, great coffee, and a tendency to wear all black too : )
melbourne sucks in a lot of ways….
sucks
sucks
sucks
I have live in Melbourne for over 97.05% of my life and found it to be the best city ever. So much respect, so much fun and the environment is well… as sweet as sugar cane. There might be a bit of crime but the amount of good people makes it un-noticeable. The trains are fantastic, they are the best, the look great and operated professionally. The trams makes everything more cheerful and lively. The city may be a bit stressful a small percentage of the time but the outer suburban areas are also fantastic.
To sum it all up, MELBOURNE IS ONE OF THE BEST CITIES IN THE WORLD AND THEIR TRAINS AND TRAMS ARE COOL. GO MELBOURNE!!!
How about Canterbury? Is that place safe and nice? My friend with move to there soon.
I am here from England and I think Melbourne is the worst city I’ve ever been to. People here are rude, bouncers love themselves so much they greet you with ‘you won’t get it, we look after our own’. I’ve lived in London for the past few years and have been to many of the clubs and never had this kind of response. Everyone in Melbourne thinks they are better than anyone else and they need to sort it out. I have been to Sydney, Brisbane and Cairns and loved all three, was welcomed well and wasn’t made to feel like a leper the whole time I was there. Melbourne is a terrible city and I don’t recommend it to anyone! Good, that’s that off my chest.
I’m always amused by Melbourne. Just about every week the Melbourne media has a pro-Melbourne, anti-Sydney rant. It always comments that Sydney is a self-centred city that talks about itself all the time. Yet the whole article is about Melbourne & how great it is. Isn’t that being self-centred & talking about itself?
The article then concludes that most of Melbourne’s charms are hidden. How could that possibly be? Hasn’t the article been about the unlimited charms of Melbourne & how much better than Sydney it is? What has been left hidden,I can only wonder?
Melbourne sure does hypocrisy well.
Been living in Melbourne since I was 4. I’ve visited several cities around the world. I’d hate to say this but Melbourne has some of the most arrogant, rude, antisocial and racist people. The lack of conversation is extremely obvious. And what is the point of having the best coffee in Australia (disputed), when staff see you there waiting, make eye contact, and then come to serve you like 3 minutes later without apology? Needless to say, there are also great people, but this is probably not a majority. Melbourne is not the most welcoming city. Even when you land at Melbourne “Tullamarine” Airport, you are already in a negative atmosphere with rude quarantine officers etc. You need to quickly make that transition from the friendly Singapore Airlines air crew to the rude Melbourne Airport employees.
Spain is perhaps the most welcoming country I’ve been to, and Japan having the most polite people.
Melbourne isn’t bad, but I think it lacks a soul if you know what I mean.
im just gunna say it, i hate melbourne its a spoilt little brat of a city and it is trying to out do sydney witch it will never do, i hate your stupid airial pingpong(afl) i hate how you try to demolish australians chances of hosting the world cup in the future, i hate how you constalty try to smash nrl…. and i am SICK OF HOW YOU ALWAYS HOST THE MAJOR SPORTING EVENTS SO FUCK YOU MELBOURNE